1. |
Monkeys
03:22
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Counting Down the Seconds
Procrastination in every step
This Boring epidemic
The mind numbs and I start feeling sick
What happened to friendship?
What happened to meeting at the pub with little advanced warning?
We've all patched holes in our sinking ships but
We're drifting apart without drowning
The light of the morning
With every sunrise the distance grows
Our silent cries became fog horns and
It's too thick now to see
It's wrapping itself around us so much we can barely breath
The sirens sound like over told jokes of a time
When we had the time to make a life of our lives
and enjoy the Journey
Well right now it feels like
We're setting sail just for the ending
Well right now it feels like
We're racing each other towards mundane recognition
I know that we are better now
I know that we've all changed
I know that age mutates our purpose
All the time to waste
I know that we are better now
I know that we've all changed
I know that age mutates our purpose
Lets work our lives away
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2. |
Absence
04:34
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I can barely begin to explain or describe the long succession of wonderful events that completely pass me by in the long exasperated sigh I call my life.
When I put pen to paper or type out second hand thoughts on my passed down phone scraping together everything I know I write about struggling and all the drinking I do in bars that don't have a clue who I am or if I even exist I'm only half certain that under the curtains my body is still animated flesh with feeling and senses.
Sometimes I wish I had the life I write about maybe then I'd have a clue what I should be writing now maybe travel more and see myself gain different perspectives but holiday making isn't making any sense to me instead I waste my days staring into space for hours each day wandering the empty corners of my mind working from thought to thought to frustration.
Focusing all me my energy on working dead endless hobbies
Avoiding all away games because free time is the enemy and the worst thing I could totally imagine finding abroad is me.
If I'm to busy making work for myself I can leave reflections on the shelf and hopefully one day I'll learn how to break mirrors while not running with scissors through the dark twisting the heartstrings of those who are persistently around me.
I just can't stand myself in the silence.
I feel like stone
I'm torn on getting better
A life spent in Absence
Incogitant perseverance
Cant break the silence
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3. |
Under
02:46
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I am so tired
Got to stay awake because there's steps I have to take
I'm more pathetic, more than I've ever been
The older I get the more the good times slip away from me
Trapped in a bubble of my own self-demise
I'm never any fun anymore and I'm half as wise
I sit alone, surrounded by friends staring at holes in the ceiling
wondering why am I like this?
Why am I not interesting?
The beauty of it all if the bombs did fall
No time to say goodbye just an end to it all
No time to say goodbye, just an end to it all
'Cause the dance I dance doesn't have any floor
No platform to take my own personal scores
I'm just alone, staring at stages and back room
Feeling so drained, trying hard not to show it too soon
If this isn't the crowd that I fit into
I'm scared I'm too stuck in my ways to fill the void via another source
Ignoring every bad omen and repeated curse
Pissing moments away not even pissed just to awkward to smile
and keep self judgement away
Everyone's celebrating the life of the dead
If they celebrated the life of the present maybe there would be less dead
I'm stood at the foot of the mountain
still making the first step it's been 8 years and counting
I took a swan dive hoping instead I would fly
and stuck my head in the water
Pretending it's not my fault the I'm under.
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4. |
InstantGrammes
06:18
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Inspired by our local MP.
Cheers Ross we couldn't of done it without you.
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5. |
Sunshine Kittens Hugs
00:30
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6. |
||||
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It's not in our best interests to be searching for more pain
yet out habits tell us to grab our jackets and step out into the rain
Glancing in every direction with indecision's we are chained
Trying to make out coffee stains from the movements that were made before we even came in these four walls entire lives have been saved
Sometimes only in a passing moment given time to re-arrange but
for others it was a place where they could stay until rent or betrayal or decay would force them out once more into the rain
Coursing through my body are the things I should never have said
Lining my face with hieroglyphics secret codes of mistakes made
They uncover themselves slowly and I learn less and less with age
Endlessly repeating stolen choruses it's like a curse
I'm folding all the corners to be read another day
spill the pages in the dark so it reads with slurs and unfocused gaze
Forcing the last drops down me as a final learning verse
That you cannot be the only
When you're already not the first.
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7. |
Futility
04:02
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I can't find it
So many things that I'm looking for
I can't describe it
But I know that there's some kind of void
My sent box is full of applications, notable contacts and follow up questions
My inbox is full of spam and my mate Chris
A friendly smile against so many missed opportunity's
I should have applied months ago
I curse at my futility
Being stuck in my ways holding the last shreds of optimism
while ignoring the fact that everyone's laughing behind my back
Like I'm part of some act
Some repetitive pest that's the butt of the joke
too ignorant to realise that he's never going to see what he wants to see
during his daily routine of coffee and keys
Drinking too much during real opportunity's
Being to shy to talk to the right kind of people
Being to negative towards music professionals
for obvious yet undermining reasons
Slaving away weeks months and years
just to stay in the same place I started in
I'm still no better now than when I was 19
I'm still no better than that petty thief
I'm still no worse off for being me
Worrying about whats left behind me rather than what I've got ahead
The ghosts of countless nights well watered but less fed
throwing out any forms of keepsakes and things that were important once
I live in the past too often to need items to summon me back
Regular occurrences of forgetting where I am combined with
Obsession with were everyone else seems to be
they say life's not competition but you lose if you don't compete
Jaded yet still chasing dreams that I know don't exist
Nothing feels right anymore
Nothing feels right anymore
What's the point in any of this
I'm far too old and jaded
What's the point in keeping
Why am I still driven to do this when attention left me years ago
My writings far too miserable now to be taken seriously
Seems I'm far too much a liar to be believed
I'm too deep into this now
If I pulled out no one would ever know these words
and this is all I know.
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